Campaign 2008, Part I

Just scrape it off your shoe and carry on

©Bryan Zepp Jamieson
http://www.mytown.ca/zepp
2/23/08

It’s beginning to look like a campaign now.

That’s a pity.

Serbia is exploding. The American embassy was torched, Serbs are in an uproar, and the US and the USSR, Incorporated, are glaring at one another over a newly independent Kosovo. The US wants Kosovo to be independent; the Russians don’t. Everyone’s wondering what the future of Cuba will be now that Fidel Castro is stepping down. (If the Cubans are smart, they’ll keep their distance from the US; they need only compare the standard of living, and yes, the freedom of a typical Cuban with his counterpart in any other Caribbean country in order to see that the US has little or no interest in their welfare). Kenya keeps threatening to turn into the next Rwanda. The US claims that Iran was toying with the notion of building nuclear weapons at one point, which begs the question, who was providing them with the technology to make that more than a pipe dream? Pakistan? Speaking of which, Musharraf acts every bit like a tinhorn dictator who is rallying the palace guard in order to maintain control despite a popular insurrection. Pakistan, of course, IS a nuclear power. I still haven’t figured out why America thinks it’s a good idea for Pakistan to have nukes.

At home, the economy is still doing a thrilling reenactment of the second hour of David Cameron’s Titanic; the part where the captain and the ship’s designer and other crew members are standing around discussing whether there is a problem, and the ship is beginning to make odd little creaking noises while the ballroom dancing continues. Oh, and America still has nearly three million people in jail. In Britain, with a fifth of the population, they are beginning to think they’ve gone too far with the “throw away the key” mentality because there are – wait for it – a total of 86,000 people in jail. Or, if you prefer, “gaol.”

But with only 250 days to go, the American media is consumed with the election, to the virtual exclusion of all else. Which would be fine, if they actually covered what the candidates say and think. But they don’t. Of course, that isn’t completely the media’s fault; their readers have to WANT comprehensive and honest coverage, and most of them don’t. People, in a land with a free press, you get pretty much the media you asked for. Just as in a democracy, you get the type of government you deserve. After that, it’s up to you.

The New York Times, to their credit, did run a story about a possible relationship between John McCain and Vicki Iseman, who was a lobbyist for Paxson Communications, an outfit that wanted to buy a television station in Pittsburg. The Times doesn’t claim that McCain was banging Ms. Iseman, even though McCain’s horn dog past wouldn’t put the possibility out of reach; they simply noted that top aides to McCain became concerned about her role in his life and went so far as to try to chase her away. This has all been reported previously by the Washington Post, Matt Drudge, that flaming liberal, and other places.

McCain held a press conference, denying any improper relationship with Ms. Iseman. Fine and good. Even if he was lying about boffing the lady lobbyist, I wouldn’t have cared less, and there’s no reason why you should care, either. To put it delicately, it’s none of your fucking business who he schtups. Grow up! [OK, I admit I -did- have a bit of fun with it, posing the question on Usenet: “What is Senator John McCain’s favorite play?” Answer: The Iseman Cometh]

But then he said that she had exerted no undue influence, and that he had never met with her boss, Bud Paxson. And that’s where it stopped being silly season crap.

Back in 2002, McCain testified under oath that not only had he met with Paxson, but he had written two letters to the FCC, imploring them to grant him the licence to purchase the television station.

Oops. Johnny, you just got caught lying, and you just gave everyone good reason to doubt your claim that Paxson Communications had no undue influence on you. All of this, incidently, is in the public record. None of it is journalistic speculation.

The reaction by the far right was nothing short of amazing. Rush Limbaugh, who had spent the past several months trying to destroy John McCain’s candidacy, began howling that the New York Times was trying to destroy John McCain’s candidacy, and that this was a bad thing. Hannity, O’Reilly, and all the other sleazeballs of the far right media obediently fell into line and began attacking the NY Times for attacking the GOP’s fine leader.

Sometime over the past several years, Conservatism stopped being a political stance, and became a mental illness. Now that McCain has outed himself as a bare-faced liar and probably a bent Senator, the far right have decided that he’s true blue (ok, red) GOP after all, and they have embraced him.

But the fact remains: McCain lied about his relationship with Iseman as a Senator and got caught. That’s not going to go away.

It took Bill O’Reilly to make an utter disgrace out of tawdry political maneuvering. Michelle Obama said “For the first time in my adult lifetime, I'm really proud of my country.” The key word, the one she emphasized, was “really.” She was describing a superlative, not a change of heart.

But the right grabbed it and ran with it. In the eyes of the right, if you don’t constantly wave the flag on demand, they’re going to make you pay. You can’t have freedom without endless avowals of unswerving patriotism, nosireebob!

Bill O’Reilly, perhaps the scummiest person in public life in America today, responded by saying, “I don't want to go on a lynching party against Michelle Obama unless there's evidence.”

When the remark blew up in his face, he tried to excuse it by noting that Slappy Thomas used it first, during his confirmation hearings.

Let’s see. Michelle Obama is also a woman. Maybe next time, Bill O’Reilly could say, “I don’t want to see Michelle Obama get gang raped unless there’s evidence”

A pity she isn’t Jewish. O’Reilly could have said, “I wouldn’t send Michelle Obama off in a train to a death camp, strip her naked, and then gas her, unless there’s evidence.”

I wonder how Bill O’Reilly would feel if someone said, “I wouldn’t ambush Bill O’Reilly and shoot him dead unless there’s evidence.”

And what “evidence” does the redoubtable Mr. O’Reilly demand? Apparently, just evidence that Michelle Obama wasn’t a mindless pep rally patriot all of her life. Not evidence of disloyalty, mind you; just evidence of lack of proper enthusiasm.

Alexsandr Solzhenitsyn, in an unforgettable vignette in “Gulag Archipelago I” wrote of a man who was hauled off to the Lubyanka for the “crime” of being the first to stop applauding when Stalin’s name was evoked during a speech. Presumably that’s the sort of evidence that will satisfy O’Reilly as a proud, loyal Republican-American.

We knew the right was on the ropes, and they would be extremely nasty. But who would have guessed that the vermin would have started so soon?